I bought these Union Jack running shoes from Brooks—the brand of shoe I run in, but not the style—last year as a dumbass $100 impulse purchase when I got cast in Billy Elliot. (Because it’s a British musical, for those of you keeping score at home.) I’ve had no productive reason to wear them since then, but I thought they’d be Northern-Europey enough to wear this weekend when I run the Nordic Fest’s Elveløpet 15K. (Because Norway is so close to the UK that their flags are suspiciously similar.) But I’m glad I did a test run this morning in them, because I just discovered they have NO (or ZERØ in Norwegian) running support or cushioning or any purpose beyond wearing them to rehearsals for British musicals (or musiçals in French, which is also Northern Europey). So my My Fair Lady rehearsals can’t start søøn enough.