IT’S VOTING DAY!

Rude.

los·er /ˈlo͞ozər/ (noun):

a person or thing that loses or has lost something

Wasn't he the host of The Dating Qame?

Plus NOT QUILTY sounds vaguely homophobic. I find this to be totally rude.

It’s gonna be a bitch getting the Russian hooker pee out of the upholstery when they lose their health insurance and have to sell this

It's January 11 and I've already broken my resolution to not engage with dipshit assholes on social media

But I didn't specify RACIST dipshit assholes in my resolution, and I'm not putting up with any of their cousin-curious bullshit ... especially from this first dude, who's too chicken to show his Master Race face in his profile when he defends racist shitholes like Steve King.

DO. NOT. BE. RACIST. Especially in front of me.

Who wants cookies?

Yay!

It’s like their props department has only one shirt for them to wear when they get cast as extras in movies about people pretending to care about stuff

Flashback Friday: Milestone Birthdays Edition

I’m not sure what’s most disturbing about this picture: the bar mitzvah clown smile, the Disney villain eyes, the dinner-plate glasses, the scarecrow neck, the weird-ass way I wore my watch on the inside of my wrist or the pink-on-white shirt that hung on me with all the sex appeal of a Mayan burial gown on an immolated corpse. The girls on my floor (Loser alert! I was living in the Foreign Language House, a co-ed dorm filled with language dorks who stayed in on Friday nights studying verb declensions!) had decorated my door with pink 21s. Probably to match the shirt. Or the homosexuality. I’m not sure where I got the wine, but I am sure I had only a sip of it to celebrate reaching such a milestone age. Because actually drinking a whole glass of alcohol on my 21st birthday would have been something the cool kids would do.

Mommy, why doesn't Jake have a boyfriend?

Because he eats too much sugar, Timmy. And because he thinks dappled roseate colorways make sense next to earthy brown colorways.

Good morning!

It’s funny because it’s true

Dotard’s bringing “Sad!” back!

Nightmare on Pennsylvania Avenue

Fucking dotarded piece of shit

6. President Dotard summons his best leadership words and calls the gunman a loser. Then he goes golfing with a gun lobbyist.

dotard

Because "lotters will be shot" kinda rhymes, and that's totally faggy

Grammar trivia:

A gazebo of racists is called a "coward."