Christmas gifts or Christmas jifts:

Battling autocorrect for the sake of a cheap pun while clearing the last of the unposted holiday memes from my phone

It’s funny because it’s true

The trees are spooky, but at least those crisp pinafores are on point

You know how Dotard McFailureFailureFailureLoser keeps obsessively bleating about “bringing Merry Christmas back” from wherever it never went? A smart person who wanted to make it look like Christmasy stuff was something he was actually capable of thinking of might remember to kinda maybe put Jesus or even Santa in his White House decorations instead of using bleak pagan treesons.

Goddam ungodly immigrants!

At first glance this looks all Christmasy

But it’s really NOT!

It’s predominately blue and snowy with only minor accents of it-looks-like-Christmas-but-it’s-not red. You could wear it fesively ALL WINTER. Unfortunately, I found the picture on a meme site and I have no idea where to buy the sweater. There really IS a War on Christmas.

All! Holidays! Matter!

Dipshitych

Is it too late for his parents to have an abortion?

Dotard simpleton with three marriages and 15 women accusing him of sexual assault gives speech on "values" to tax-exempt voting bloc that selectively fabricates its "values" system from the unread bibles it wields as weapons in a persecution-complex war of its own making.

Learn all about jeebus here: Trump pledges fealty to religious values, “Merry Christmas”