Monday, November 05, 2018

So we have it on good authority ...

(you wouldn’t lie to us, Thomas, would you? because I haven’t had breakfast yet and we just got in line) that this is “the best ride at Disney World”—which, actually, was just confirmed by the repeat riders in front of us in line. Which softens the blow a bit. Plus I reserved our FastPasses online two months ago and it wasn’t even on the menu, which I guess double-confirms.
For a bit of 150-minute perspective: I ran an entire half marathon yesterday in 179 minutes. My 5-Hour Energy will be exactly halfway done keeping me upright by the time we get on the ride. THE ENTIRE AVATAR MOVIE IS JUST 12 MINUTES LONGER THAN WE’LL STAND IN LINE.

Thankfully, the kids in line behind us are whiling away their time with a quiet, respectful game of SCREAM AND SHRIEK LIKE SUGAR-FUELED LITTLE ASSHOLES. We’re all sincerely hoping it goes into overtime. Plus lightning rounds. Plus a final death match. Or perhaps an extra-early death match.

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