So apparently THIS happened

Remember when Ann was caught screaming about being forced to fly coach and sobbing that she’s gonna die alone? I can’t decide if that Ann or this one is the most punchable.

It’s official!

The Nike shoes I ordered on Tuesday arrived yesterday (because Nordstrom doesn't mess around when it comes to shipping) but they're kinda ugly

So I'm returning them and I pre-ordered THIS instead:

Karma can be a dick

I stole this from Twitter and rewrote it a bit

He puzzled and puzzled till his puzzler was sore.
Then The Kushner thought of something he hadn't before:
Perhaps foreign-affairs experience can't be bought at a store ...
Perhaps foreign-affairs experience ... means a little bit more!

Tucker is desperately rationalizing like one of trump’s wives

My money's on Jared next

But instead of shouting BINGO! when he's out, I'm gonna shout GAYFACE!

Proposed taglines for trump.dating

StrKKKts only!
Taking sheep breeding to the next level!
Swipe Reich!
Take a break from inbreeding!
Have sex for less than $130 million!
Three-wife limit!
Where “happily married people” count as “local singles”!
Date local married singles!
Grab him by the bone spur!
Red hats, white sheets and who cares if you’re already married?
A new way to fuck the whole country!
Where it doesn’t matter how small your hands are!
I do-tard!
Where shitholes meet!