UFO ABDUCTS HORSE!

Goddam ungodly immigrants!

YOU are disturbing

Technically, that photo is neither a mother nor a wife nor a human being. Grammar! And technically, you appear to be a wife in name only. You chose to marry him, you chose to have a child with him, you had over a year of an ugly campaign to understand exactly the level of scrutiny and expectation you'd face if you became his first lady -- which now makes you fair game for all that scrutiny -- and now you have chosen to very publicly not live with your husband-in-name-only at tremendous expense to the public. I agree with you that the photo is disturbing, but don't insult us by playing the wife card in your feigned indignance. And if you're so desperate to hide in your gilded tower out of the public eye, then stop making pointless tweets and giving perfunctory interviews to the media your husband-in-name-only so vehemently attacks. I don't respect you, I don't feel sorry for you and I don't have any interest in the tone-deaf meaninglessness you bring to the public discourse.

Dare to have dreams. And strive to achieve them.

Everything's just wonderful!

Didja do anything productive with the students, Melania? Share knowledge? Celebrate cultures? Offer tips on contouring or gold-digging? Or was it just all about you having a wonderful time?

Ya know, your man-boy husband does the same thing in his tweets: He always reports that he has "good meetings" with people as though that were newsworthy or valuable information to share with the public. He never reports topics discussed, commonalities found, diplomacies achieved ... just the relentless goodness of every meeting he has. It's like neither of you has critical thinking skills, the ability to interpret experiences or shape narratives, a useful education, or even shame over the fact that of all the things that happen in your glamorous, influential, tireless-public-servant lives, all you can ever seem to come up with when you decide Hey! I should put this on Twitter! is that your meetings were good ... or to your great fortune today, wonderful.

If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were both pointless, uneducated, narcissistic, tone-deaf hypocrites who suck the blood of taxpayers and sleep on beds of dead children. But we all know that's not true. As you told us in your tweet today, all you do with children is have a wonderful time with them. And that's just wonderful!

Some people have it all.

Some people have trouble keeping their rings from getting all crooked.