Wait to buy this month's Big Gay Book Club book until eight days before the book club meeting. Discover it's out of print and your only option is to order a used copy online. Quickly abandon all plans to buy or read it.
Show up for the meeting without having read the book. Think you can just throw in some ten-dollar English-major words like picaresque or bildungsroman or paragraph and hope nobody notices.
Get sleepy during the discussion since you don't have anything to say that could count as actually contributing to the conversation.
When it's over, amuse everyone—including your husband—with the story of the distractingly hot guy you'd smiled at on the train who actually handed you his business card as he got off the train when you were on your way to the book club meeting. Which really has nothing to do with being a bad book club member. But it's a great way to end this blog post. Almost as great as the fact that when you looked up the distractingly hot guy on Facebook you discovered that he already has a husband.
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