Eight reasons today rocks

1. I got a voicemail this morning from my sister, who led my uncommonly photogenic niece and nephew through a shouting chorus of “Happy Birthday” for me. And while I’m sorry I missed the call (though I’m not surprised—I have T-Mobile, after all), I’m glad I have it saved on my cell phone so I can listen to it over and over and over. Which I’ve already done about 50 times today.

2. My family had a cake delivered to my office this morning. So even though none of my co-workers cared kept track long enough to remember that they should have decorated my desk with $100 bills or thrown me a surprise party or brought in dancing hookers (the bitches), now they can’t escape the fact—because it’s written IN FROSTING—that today is the Most Important Day In The History Of The Universe and they should really bow before me with offerings of aromatic oils and perhaps some gift cards from my favorite participating retailers.

3. The show this weekend kicked ass. We got tons of cheers, tons of applause, tons of compliments … and now I have tons of sweaty, stinky socks and tight black shirts to wash. And I have tons of happy memories from what was perhaps the best show we’ve produced in the three years I’ve been in the chorus.

4. Too lazy to clean my house and throw an actual birthday party for myself, I simply brought a cake to the cast party on Saturday night. The cake was store-bought and can-o-squirt-frosting customized by my mom and me. And it tasted like shit and looked like it was decorated in the dark. But people were having such a good time that nobody seemed to notice. And they didn’t even use silverware or plates when they gobbled it up, so maybe it wasn’t that bad.

5. My family bought me new running shoes and new running shorts. I’ve never had REAL running shorts before, and these have a little underpants-like liner with a horizontal bar of foam padding designed to keep my balls from bouncing around and hurting people. I’m hoping that the little foam bar also includes a bonus tickle factor. I’ll be sure to keep you posted if I find one.

6. It’s gorgeous outside. Simply gorgeous.

7. And there are daffodils and tulips everywhere. I love daffodils and tulips. And not just because I’m a pansy—I like them because they symbolize the end of winter, they carry with them the promise of spring and summer, they’re really beautiful … and they’re usually in full bloom on my birthday. It’s nature’s way of celebrating my thick, luxurious hair arrival.

8. Speaking of my thick, luxurious hair, I still have all of it. Even at the ripe old age of 37. Even though it seems to sparkle with more and more little flecks of gray every time I look in the mirror. But the sparkly gray hairs pull attention away from the fine lines and wrinkles around my eyes and mouth. And in the right light I think I can still get away with 36. And a half.