Learnings from an early morning Elf the Musical performance for area grade-schoolers:

1. They’re too cool to laugh at Ted Talks jokes.
2. Gay-coworker jokes are totally bougie and last-year to them.
3. It is easy to identify and know to avoid the one mild swear word in the script in the nanosecond between when it’s said and when the kids file it away mentally to repeat ad nauseam on the bus on the way back to school.