It was the dishwasher. Which we had checked and checked again over the last five days and found nothing on its control panel that seemed beepworthy.
Apparently I had emptied the dishwasher before it was finished drying the dishes.
And apparently the genius engineers at GE decided that a half-finished drying cycle was something consumers would want to know about. And that tiny beeps spaced one minute apart with no flashing lights or other visual tie-in cues would be a valuable component of this valuable alert feature.
Apparently the genius engineers at GE suck ass. But only when it’s completely dry.